The waiting game

It has been 6 weeks since our initial appointment at guy’s hospital with the genetic counsellor and we are still waiting for our referral appointment with the PGD team.

So being the impatient cow that I am, yesterday I called them to chase it up. I was a little disappointed to learn that we had only just been referred and that we would have to wait about 8 weeks for our next appointment. However, being told that we would have an appointment with the PGD team in 8 weeks has made it seem real once again and I am starting to get that mix of emotions, that I had a few weeks ago. I am excited that the ball is rolling, nervous as we will apply for the funding and apprehensive as I know it is a bit of a long shot.

I was happy to learn that all my rollercoaster emotions are totally normal. The genetic counsellor did say she would be worried if I hadn’t been a bit emotional!

I know I am ready for this now. I am surrounded by lots of babies and bumps at the moment. Everyone I know seems to be pregnant or have a new born. I honestly never thought I would ever say this, but I am a little envious. I can’t go one week without a new baby announcement or a pregnancy announcement. A good friend of mine is overdue so there will be a new baby to cuddle next week J

I know I have to be patient and that maybe this will happen for us. I just can’t seem to be able to wait for anything! Plus, it seems I am thinking about this far too much. We need to be focusing on the now and doing the things in our life that we cannot do when you have a baby and not worrying about what will happen in the next couple of years. I need to give my brain a rest. Why can’t I just relax?

There is a pack from the PDG team at Guy’s on its way to us at the moment. When it arrives, I know I will read and pull every piece of information apart. That is what I do! I also have a programme sky plus’d that was shown on BBC2 this week about testing your genes. There is a piece in the documentary which explains the PGD IVF so of course I will be pulling that apart this weekend. I am pleased there is lots of information out there, but maybe there is too much for someone like me! I need to stop googling and start relaxing!

I just wish I could be more patient and go with the flow!

A very impatient Bouche x x x

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