Dear so and so
To the man at the station who handed me a copy of the metro, what a gent you are. Your act of chivalry made me smile this morning
To the man who decided to crush me on the train when you were sitting next to me. Working on your laptop whilst reading the paper and drinking your coffee and elbowing me in the side was not appreciated. If you have so much to do when you clearly cannot multi task suggests to me that you need to get your arse out of bed earlier.
To little J. I love you as you were my own and I know you can’t help it but I wish you would appreciate your Daddy and all that he does for you sometimes. When I see how rubbish some live apart fathers are it makes me realise how amazing your daddy is. You are a very lucky boy.
To the lazy fuckwit in my office. When you drain the coffee jug of coffee it is YOUR responsibility to replace it! No doubt you have magic fairies in your home that do this for you. These fairies probably take your shirts out of the basket, wash them, iron them and place them in your wardrobe. These fairies do not follow you to work!
To T-mobile. I do not want to share the Orange network. I am happy to use the T-mobile network and if I lose reception I don’t get too upset, I just wait for T-Mobile to come back. By MAKING me use Orange I never get a T Mobile signal as Orange is more powerful in my area! Which means I can’t tweet, can’t facebook and can’t blog on my mobile! Grrrr Although after my rants last night I would like to thank you for the £10 credit for my rage.
To my certain members of my family. You are not very nice people. I am ashamed to call you family and by ringing up asking me how am I after root canal as a way of asking for money is shallow and rude. I have my own family now who are my priority. I will no longer be loaning any of you any money. Plus, I have in laws now who treat me as their own and who I love more than you. I just feel sad for my sister who has at least another 10 years of having to live with you cretins. Oh and yes you are like a family from shameless.
To the rubbish weather yesterday. I made an effort for work yesterday and I did not appreciate the wind around the city. I really don’t think the people folk of London needed to see my pants as dress blew up! Twice! Including a bus full of people!
To my neighbour who has surround sound! Hearing you watch documentaries on war planes is not fun especially at 1am on a school night.
To some of my friends on facebook. Seeing you ‘check in’ at asda’s is just sad. No one needs to know that! Anymore and I am deleting you. This also includes checking in at b and q, morrisons, lakeside, bluewater or your own bed!
To my boys, please aim better! Cleaning up pee is never pleasant!
and finally thank you cyber world for allowing me to gob off!
Bouche x x x
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