A sense of pride

When i said to my husband that I wanted to do a blog, he was quite negative. I think he thought that maybe i was seeking some sort of internet stardom! I always had a vision for my blog. I guess some may say i have a lot to contend with. I have a terminally ill father with Huntington disease and a step son with Aspergers and ADHD. My vision was always that i would blog about girly things and the loves in my life, my ranting and raving, and mostly to have a place where i could put my thoughts and offload my emotions, happy and sad. I guess i wanted my blog to be a diary / journal.

I had written a few posts which were quite impersonal, but still very my gobby, opinioniated self and a couple which were very personal for example (https://boucheinthecity.wordpress.com/2011/01/17/daddys-girl/ and https://boucheinthecity.wordpress.com/2011/01/10/love-and-marriage/. However, when i wrote my last post https://boucheinthecity.wordpress.com/2011/02/02/we-are-all-special/ something inside my husband stirred. All his negativity or abstaining from comment diminished. I didn’t ask him to read my post but i had asked the night before, if i could write a post about little J and aspergers. He had picked up my post from my tweet and he read it. Later that morning he sent me a blackberry message, ‘just read your last post, I think it’s really good. It is really beautifilly written. You are a really good writer and I am really proud of you’. I was at work and couldn’t gob off about my husband’s comments. However, I had a smile from ear to ear. I wasn’t seeking recognition. The blog is for me and if others read and enjoy that is a bonus!, but the fact the man i love so much had read it, related to it and enjoyed it meant so much.

Neither of us are great at putting our thoughts into words and we deal with my Dad’s illness and little J’s challenges silently. We know when the other needs a hug without saying it. We often cry or mope in private but we are a silent support for each other. Sometimes when either or us find it tough, rather than speaking we email each other. Some people may think this strange but to us it helps to offload without causing lots of tears and drama.

For me boucheinthecity will be one of my silent releases of my Joy, sadness or Pain. I guess occasionally my blog will also be an emotional channel to my husband / best friend / my rock.

I am so pleased that my monkey (my husband) has connected with boucheinthecity, and is pleased with how i have written about our gorgeous boy and the pride he has in me. It has made me think that maybe i can be a crediable writer / blogger. Even if no one reads my blog as long as i enjoy putting my thoughts down in type and my monkey reads, relates, and loves my posts,  i will be one happy bouche and one bouche beaming with pride.

Thank you my monkey for your support, silent or vocal, your encouragement and your love.

I love you very very much x x x

Bouche (aka monkey too)


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